Pink hair. An adorable accent. Tattoos, jewelry, and bright vintage outfits. She’s not even afraid to show her tummy, which — if I may comment on another woman’s body — is what I would call "normal." (And I’m so RELIEVED by that.) I found her last week. And though she probably doesn’t neeeeeed me to help add to her 893K audience, I do think she might be worth a look if you have the time. Florence Given took over my life (and motivation) last week. I binged and binged and binged. Couldn’t look away. Bad for my productivity, yes. But I also put Florence in the very rare category of “productive scrolling” for me. Because Florence did what practically NO ONE else on social media can … she made me feel GOOD and ENERGIZED.
I tend to be attracted to people like Florence: loud, colorful, unabashed. But it’s not just their aesthetic that draws me in. The ones that truly capture me are the ones that are authentically themselves. I reflected on this. And that’s when things turned a bit sour for a moment. If I’m attracted to LOUD authenticity … why would anyone be attracted to my own QUIET authenticity? In a very human move, I compared myself to Florence.
I mean, fuck ... she even says "fuck" more than I do. The spiral started knocking, and I had all but resigned for the day. BUT THEN … I recalled all of the other also “quietly authentic” women I follow, work with, and admire. The ones without the pink hair, without the flower mood rings, without the green shag coats. I love them, look up to them, and want to have wine with them JUST AS MUCH. So I adjusted my lens: I’m not just attracted to loud authenticity. I’m attracted to authenticity, in any shape or form it introduces itself in my life. I’m attracted to the *energy* of someone being themself. I’ve also found it doesn’t usually matter whether I like/agree/resonate with them or not … I’m still drawn to them. Because there is something so magnetically alluring about someone who is comfortable in their own skin (especially, I’d argue, if they’re NOT particularly loud or outrageous). These thoughts were constantly rolling in my head last week, so I wanted to email you about it, on the chance that you, too, might struggle to love your own authenticity when it’s up against the backdrop of such BIG personalities online. People like people. And you, Reader, are a person. You have thoughts, quirks, habits, biases, dislikes, obsessions, favorite colors. When you add it all up, the combo makes you irresistibly unique. You just have to start believing that. So rather than comparing ourselves to the loud, beautiful people of the internet, let’s spend that time getting to know our own beautiful selves … and then being “loud” in our own ways. Much love ✌️Kelsey PS Here are a few of my favorite reels from Florence: If you think you’re not qualified to do what you want to do If you want to see the body positivity that *I* personally need to see |
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